Idiom

I'm a pretty verbal person.

(In case you hadn't noticed)

I basically write for a living. Sure, there's strategy development and people management and negotiations and kicking suppliers' asses and giving feedback to people who don't want it - but in the end, it's about the words. How do I tell this? How do I validate our actions? How do I explain the past, the future, the present? What's the right tone of voice, the right phrasing, the right timing? How can I use what's been said to our advantage?

And you're right, it's boring. I should have become a YA novel writer.

Girl meets boy through intergalactic wormhole, girl turns out to be in a coma dreaming of boy wonder who came out of a wormhole, boy struggles with the side effects of being a celebrity in his own world, turns out boy made up girl in order to cope. Which reality is 'real'? And who is behind the control panel?

That kind of crap.

Or just any dystopia as a backdrop to blossoming teenage love. Ka-ching.

But I digress. Like I said - verbal.

I like people. I use words with people to get to know them. To find out what makes them tick. To find out how I feel about them. To see if I can catch them off guard. It gets awesome when they catch me off guard. Challenge me. When they are smarter than I am. Or when they present a perspective that I haven't seen yet.

I talk all day. To friends, because my friends are my salvation. To family, because I can't shake them. To co-workers, because I have to. To my son, because he is the most important person on the planet. And sometimes, I even listen. Give feedback. Use words to comfort them, put them at ease, give them new ideas, picture a mirror for them when they need it.

I like talking. In Dutch, I don't even suck at it. I am surrounded with people who are very willing and capable of talking with me. In conclusion, I am a blessed person.

Yet, I miss something. I miss crawling up to that person I can be absolutely non-verbal with. Not say anything. Be held. Hold in return. Shutting the hell up. Really, truly and thoroughly relax with. Breathing out without having to get enough oxygen back in for another sentence. Another story. Another explanation.

Be content. Be at peace. Just be.

I guess I don't miss that something, but I miss that someone. Never did before, but now I do.

In that absence, I'm choosing to talk about it.

Isn't that ironic?