More whine. What else?

Not much to report.

The floor is fixed, so that's good. This weekend will be all about getting the place in order. And getting a new stove/furnace, since my current one short circuited the other day. After a week of microwave food, I cannot wait to cook something decent again.

Yannick is not doing too great. He's been attacking the other kids in daycare and just overall won't listen and throws fits. I'm very worried about him. I can't write too much about it because I'll start to cry.

I am on my second week having my period. Isn't one of the perks of a period (of time), that it has an end??? Where's my end??? People say I should see a doctor about it. I just had it with doctors though. What is he going to tell me? Good luck and wait what happens next month, is my guess.

After an incident related to the above paragraph last week, I managed to attend my new pilates class this week. Although I could not get the worries out of my head (see second paragraph), it did do me a lot of good. I'm staying at this class and I'll try to plan some time to do extra excersises at home.

I am fully aware that my pity party for one is lasting way too long by the way. I do not know how to snap out of it. If I didn't know any better, I'd say I'm suffering from a mild depression. But since the whole world is already medicalising everything, I'm just going to say that I need a good firm kick in the butt.

Love you all.

Anyone seen my optimism?

I seem to have lost it. It's a pretty vital part of my personality, if not the backbone, if not the heart. So if you happen to see it, please send it back to me.

As for an update...

- The doctor's visit with Yannick went... inconclusive. She says it's pretty much a 50/50 percent thing. He could either grow out of the door obsession and the echoing, or it could get worse. If it does, in a years time we will start with some tests. For now, we are just enjoying the little kid and his endless enthusiasm (maybe HE stole my optimism. Darnit).

- The apartment is nowhere near done. There's a leak underneath the floor and they pulled out half of it (the floor). It's still open because the ground underneath first has to dry. Which means my furniture is stacked to the walls and Yannick cries every time he comes home with me. He wants to go to the old house or his dad's. Awesome, no?

- I went to a Coldplay show on Thursday and it rocked my world. They played Lost, I was happy. Lost is my divorce song. I mean... it's the most fitting, don't you think? Anyway, when I first left the husband, this was the song that was on repeat for a long while.

I hardly ever go to SHOW shows. With videos playing, butterflies flying, balls bouncing and fireworks popping, I mean. And I liked it. Total lazy entertainment, great music (shut up) and Chris' sweat splattering against my cheek (I was pretty close). Okay, maybe I could have done without the sweat, but it was still great.

- I'm saving up (as soon as the ridiculous amounts of cash stops disappearing from my wallet) for some sort of new laser treatment for my skin. I know, I'm vain. Please shut up. I'm 36 years old and I'm really, really tired of my skin getting more and more 'youthful'. God, when I was in high school, I had one zit each month (yes, at that time). That was it! Now? You can call Neil Armstrong and tell him there's a new moon to discover on my face.

Whine. Bitch. Repeat.

Again.

I'D REALLY LIKE TO BE HAPPY AND CHIPPER. But first I need to find my optimism. Stat.