i just called sarah and i left her the most incoherent voice mail ever.
then i called whoops and the world is a bit more right again.
love you all.
off to bed for real now.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
it's too much
okay - yannick is asleep, maarten is out working, i'm finally sitting down and i feel like shit.
everybody needs to fuck off. since day one i've been forced to defend my choice to work fulltime, while having an infant at home. yes, sometimes that sucks. sometimes i want to be at home rather than having to deal with piss-poor excuses for 'problems' at work. "but who's taking care of him then???" is a phrase i just cannot hear anymore. no-one is taking care of him. we just leave him in the morning with a bottle beside his bed. what do you think? i think i'm going to have a t-shirt printed that says: "my kid is at home with his dad. unless it's tuesday or wednesday, when he's at the best day-care ever. satisfied?"
yes people, i do miss him. i even miss him now, while he's asleep. i can't explain to you what it is to have a child and what it is to be a mother but if you are, you know what i mean when i say that i even miss him when he's asleep. the other day i had a supplier (a SUPPLIER to whom i am a CLIENT) on the phone and when he finally understood i really, really was at work five days a week, he bluntly told me i shouldn't have kids. no, really, that totally made my day.
and no, i'm not a raging feminist and i do not feel that all mothers should work. one of my best friends is a stay-at-home mom, another works three days a week (and some more in the evenings) and another does not have children. i love them all and i stand by them all. they all had to make a choice and i support them 300%. when will people start to realize that happy kids come from happy parents? that all children are different, as are all mothers? that the fact that i work my ass off so that my child is can be raised and taken care off by at least one of his parents five days a week is something i do out of love for him?
maybe one day i can work four days a week. it's not unthinkable, especially in the netherlands, where flexible hours on management level are a more accepted concept. maybe that will pan out. but i've come to the conclusion that even then, people will harass me with their narrow-minded, mid-fifties ideas. and they all need to sit on their finger and back the fuck off.
well, that's off my chest.
another thing that bothers me is that i really don't have enough time. i want to call sarah to discuss the upcoming dave & TIM!! shows. i want to call whoops to tell him how much i love him and thank him for the dmb calendar he sent me. i want to call meeks and gina (preferably at the same time) and find out how they are doing. i want to get rid off the ton of e-mail that i still need to answer. i want to call my uncle to set a date so he can visit his ... what is it called? great nephew? i want to call my stepmom so she can visit. i want to see my other stepmom because i see her as my true 'other mom'. i want to fly to america and kiss the ground. i want to have the energy to do all this, be a great mom, be a great employee, get another degree (it's addicting), be a great wife, start painting again, search the net for new music, dive into secondlife, find out what the hyves-hype is all about, develop a decent myspace profile, be a great friend, make my own clothes, finally learn how to do cartwheels.
i guess i'll go to bed instead.
everybody needs to fuck off. since day one i've been forced to defend my choice to work fulltime, while having an infant at home. yes, sometimes that sucks. sometimes i want to be at home rather than having to deal with piss-poor excuses for 'problems' at work. "but who's taking care of him then???" is a phrase i just cannot hear anymore. no-one is taking care of him. we just leave him in the morning with a bottle beside his bed. what do you think? i think i'm going to have a t-shirt printed that says: "my kid is at home with his dad. unless it's tuesday or wednesday, when he's at the best day-care ever. satisfied?"
yes people, i do miss him. i even miss him now, while he's asleep. i can't explain to you what it is to have a child and what it is to be a mother but if you are, you know what i mean when i say that i even miss him when he's asleep. the other day i had a supplier (a SUPPLIER to whom i am a CLIENT) on the phone and when he finally understood i really, really was at work five days a week, he bluntly told me i shouldn't have kids. no, really, that totally made my day.
and no, i'm not a raging feminist and i do not feel that all mothers should work. one of my best friends is a stay-at-home mom, another works three days a week (and some more in the evenings) and another does not have children. i love them all and i stand by them all. they all had to make a choice and i support them 300%. when will people start to realize that happy kids come from happy parents? that all children are different, as are all mothers? that the fact that i work my ass off so that my child is can be raised and taken care off by at least one of his parents five days a week is something i do out of love for him?
maybe one day i can work four days a week. it's not unthinkable, especially in the netherlands, where flexible hours on management level are a more accepted concept. maybe that will pan out. but i've come to the conclusion that even then, people will harass me with their narrow-minded, mid-fifties ideas. and they all need to sit on their finger and back the fuck off.
well, that's off my chest.
another thing that bothers me is that i really don't have enough time. i want to call sarah to discuss the upcoming dave & TIM!! shows. i want to call whoops to tell him how much i love him and thank him for the dmb calendar he sent me. i want to call meeks and gina (preferably at the same time) and find out how they are doing. i want to get rid off the ton of e-mail that i still need to answer. i want to call my uncle to set a date so he can visit his ... what is it called? great nephew? i want to call my stepmom so she can visit. i want to see my other stepmom because i see her as my true 'other mom'. i want to fly to america and kiss the ground. i want to have the energy to do all this, be a great mom, be a great employee, get another degree (it's addicting), be a great wife, start painting again, search the net for new music, dive into secondlife, find out what the hyves-hype is all about, develop a decent myspace profile, be a great friend, make my own clothes, finally learn how to do cartwheels.
i guess i'll go to bed instead.
Saturday, February 24, 2007
!!!
IT'S DAVE AND TIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
i'm in a bad mood
birth control. why is it called 'birth control'? in dutch it's called 'anti-conception', which, i think, makes more sense. anyway, i have new 'birth control' and i think it's stirring my hormonal balance. or maybe i'm still de-pregnating. in any case, i'm looking for an excuse to rip people's heads off.
(it's one of those days you don't wanna wake up everything is *** everybody sucks - heee, i'm a teenager)
things i currently really, really hate:
1. dr. phil. you're just making matters worse.
2. child molestors. die.
3. co-workers that just don't get that they are not the king of everything and everyone. i really don't care that you got your phd in rocket science - you don't know shit about my field of expertise. piss off.
4. men who think they are god's gift to women. grow up.
5. stupidity displayed by people who should know better.
i know i should end this ridiculous post with my current loves. i don't know if i can get to 5 though
1. yannick and maarten. it's insane.
2. my friends. holy shit, i love my friends.
3. yeah - i'm out.
(it's one of those days you don't wanna wake up everything is *** everybody sucks - heee, i'm a teenager)
things i currently really, really hate:
1. dr. phil. you're just making matters worse.
2. child molestors. die.
3. co-workers that just don't get that they are not the king of everything and everyone. i really don't care that you got your phd in rocket science - you don't know shit about my field of expertise. piss off.
4. men who think they are god's gift to women. grow up.
5. stupidity displayed by people who should know better.
i know i should end this ridiculous post with my current loves. i don't know if i can get to 5 though
1. yannick and maarten. it's insane.
2. my friends. holy shit, i love my friends.
3. yeah - i'm out.
Friday, February 16, 2007
what were you thinking dood?
i guess google/googe did it on purpose.
personally, i think it's poor design. sorry, google doodlers.
so what's up in the netherlands?
TWO MORE WEEKS UNTIL DAVE THAT'S WHAT'S UP!!!
back to work.
personally, i think it's poor design. sorry, google doodlers.
so what's up in the netherlands?
TWO MORE WEEKS UNTIL DAVE THAT'S WHAT'S UP!!!
back to work.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
shhhhh...
one of my co-workers stumbled upon my blog. i guess from now on, i'll have to be more careful as to what i scribble on here. another co-worker (news travels fast) just told me: "hey, i saw your blog. but don't worry - i didn't read your delivery story. hahaha!"
wonderful.
anyway... happy valentine's day if that's your thing!
if you're more like me: just remember, google is on our side.
wonderful.
anyway... happy valentine's day if that's your thing!
if you're more like me: just remember, google is on our side.
Monday, February 12, 2007
24*7
I WANT TO WRITE A FULL POST
... but i still don't have the time
except that yannick suddenly has teeth. two of them - both appeared on the same day and he didn't even cry or shit his butt to bits. we're beyond lucky with this kid.
... but i still don't have the time
except that yannick suddenly has teeth. two of them - both appeared on the same day and he didn't even cry or shit his butt to bits. we're beyond lucky with this kid.
Thursday, February 8, 2007
random things
- did i mention my mom gave a really cool ipod for my graduation? did i? well, she did. i'm so happy with it. it's one of those that play video as well. my mom rules. i dl-ed soulive's 'next' today from itunes and am now at work rocking out to it (no more meetings today so i can let my hair down!)
- work today is flooded with australians. they keep saying 'no worries' as a response to almost anything, and this young girl got so confused she exclaimed 'i'm not worried!! i am NOT worried!!' at one point. it was quite funny.
- finally it's snowing in the old nl! maarten reported from home that yannick got exceptionally excited at the view of snow flakes swirling down.
- did i mention that with yannick's cool onesies and pants, miss marika also sent a mixed cd? did i? well, she did. it's one of my favorites in rotation in the car right now. thanks meeks!
- two more weeks and we'll have to start giving yannick vegetables and fruit :(. i can't postpone it any longer than that, unless the doctor agrees on giving him a supplement. fingers crossed.
Monday, February 5, 2007
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